
Linda asks…
Do people have separation/ Divorce parties?
I’ve seen in card shops pertaining to separations and divorces. But the reason I ask is mostly out of curiosity.People have babyshowers, wedding showers, second marriages where they have a full blown regular wedding due to one party never being married before. So would someone have a such a party for just celebration or as a”shower” so too speak as a way of starting over new and fresh?
answers:
I have heard of this but only from movies and TV shows. Some cards are created just to get you to buy something when there is no actual need. I can’t see anything wrong with this sort of party; however, a separation seems too personal to do this and the people might just get back together. It can be embarrassing and harmful to the marriage to let out the dirty linen when you might get back together. It isn’t like sharing with your mother or a best friend.
When I divorced, I found the situation too sad to celebrate. That doesn’t mean I wasn’t glad for it to be over, just that it is hard to be with someone for years and see it end badly. Of course, I wasn’t divorcing Donald Trump and having expectations of $$$ afterwards.

Daniel asks…
When does the pain of divorce stop hurting?
We are nearing the end of the divorce process. The other party has offered to settle. I’m the one who filed. Why is it that I am so hurt and sad? Why is it that I can’t stop crying? I don’t think I would ever go back but why am I so hurt still?
answers:
It is natural to grieve the death of the dreams and hopes of your life with your spouse. Your sadness comes from facing the fact that an important period in your life is over. You should give yourself permission to cry if you feel like it.
Edit: I’m pretty sure the first two people who answered you have never been married. I am married.

Lisa asks…
What would happen if all of the no fault divorce laws were repealed and you had to have legitimate grounds?
Why don’t men fight to have all of the no fault divorce laws repealed? If the party can’t prove adultery or abuse then either the divorce is not granted or if so the other party is not harmed financially i.e. child support, alimony, division of property? Wouldn’t this be fair to all parties involved?
answers:
No, it would not be fair. First of all, I don’t want some judge deciding the fate of my marriage. If I and/or my wife wants out of a marriage, the state should not have the power to FORCE you to stay with someone you can’t stand. Anyone should be able to divorce whenever they want. Anything less than that is slavery. NOBODY owns me. Not even my wife, who I love very much.
Child support is not, as you called it, “financial harm.” You had kids, now you gotta pay for them. Period. And it will be that way until those kids are 18 years old (and probably longer). This is only right. If you have kids, expect to pay for their care and upbringing for as long as you live. And the less time you spend with them, the more you should have to pay. Most people don’t seem to realize that these rules come with having kids. If the rules seem unattractive, my advice is to not have kids!
As for alimony, well, sometimes alimony makes sense and sometimes it doesn’t. If the mother wins custody, and makes significantly less money than the father, then it is in the interests of the children that the father financially support the mother of his children while she raises them. That’s just life.
Division of property is only fair. If you owned something BEFORE marriage, then that should remain yours. For example, if you own a house free and clear BEFORE marrying, you should get that in the divorce. But if you bought the house AFTER you were married, then yes, she should get half it’s current equity. She supported the family by either working, paying the mortgage, or raising your children while you worked. That means she’s earned a piece of that house. ANYTHING purchased while the two of you are married is half hers. She’s sharing your bed, your home, and helping care for your kids. That earns her something.
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